Why am I so foolish? Why would I get upset when feelings had just faded away? Why would I get envious? Or would I say, is just pure regrets? I rejected you. I rejected church. I rejected my best friend. I rejected God. I even rejected myself. What are all these indulgence? Do I feel good & happy after all this shit? I hate myself. I hate it for who I am. I dislike my life. I dislike the way I am living it. I hate the way I am ruining myself. Trashing all my dreams and forgetting my purposes. It will just lead me to nowhere. Is that what I want in my life? A life of sin? A life of regrets? A life of pains & hatreds? Will I ever be back to You? Will You still accept me? I am so ashamed to even think about coming back to You! Will I one day stand in front of you and not shiver? Will I one day be bold enough to confess your love for me? Will I be able to handle the consequences once I said I really love you? So what if I really love you? I am such a coward. I do not dare to do so. I am afraid of the world. Though, I am afraid of the judgments but I am blinded by the darkness. Are you disappointed with me? Isn’t this is what you had foresee? You have brought me so far and yet I am so ungrateful. Am I happy with this outcome? Am I satisfied with a life like this? How I wish I could just disappear, away from every one else. Can I bear to forsake my family & friends? Can I be so selfish? Am I capable to do that? Do I have the courage to do so? Don't ask me what happen? I have no idea… is just emotions taking me over.
P.S. Pls save any comments to yourself, I really appreciated it!
About Me
Name: qiaoxiang Love: God, Family, Friends
Hate: Noise & Crowds
Favourite Quote:"If we cannot love the person whom we can see, how can we love God , whom we cannot see?" by Mother Teresa