This afternoon, my mum brought us to visit our grandpa at the nursing home. Coincidentally, my grandma was there too. The environment is fine, everything is fine but there were so much going on in my mind when I was there. I feel so much for my grandpa, not only for him alone but for all the old folks who are there. Reason being why my grandpa is there because we need somebody to look after him as he got walking difficulty. Asking why cant his children take up this responsibility? *sigh* I guess adults have their own problem & reasoning. Anyway, staying at the nursing home is not cheap either. One good thing is that there are doctors & people constantly taking care of them.

I have to admit that I am not very close with my maternal grandparents as we do not stay together & stayed rather far apart. But each time when I pay them a visit, I feel a special kind of bonding there. I cant help but tears just welled up my eyes each time I see them. Not that they are unwell or whatsoever, but looking at how they have aged & how physically weak they have become just pains my heart. How I wish I could just give them a big hug & show my affections. One greatest regrets is that I cant speak their language & many times I can only smile & nod my head. There is so much I want to do but I can only do so little.

I was so affected after walking out of the nursing home. So many “only if” pop out in my mind. Only if I could do this, only if I could do that… *sigh*

I told my mum how I felt but she stayed silence throughout. I understand that there’s so much she wanted to do for her dad also but she has her own difficulty.

I am truly amazed at how the love between has lasted for a few decades & still growing strong. Many times, I thought it was just a responsibility & obligation to stay & grow old together, throughout. But I was wrong. Looking at the adoration being exchange through their eye contact was a beautiful sight. It just touches my heart. I wouldn’t call that a true love but it is a kind of love that far exceeds true love. Looking at their wrinkled smile, it just melts my heart.